Unconventional relationships.

This week we have another guest blog. I met this lovely lady recently and felt we had a lot in common. I hope in sharing this story it helps you too.


First of all thanks to muddly mum for letting me share my blog here. I prefer to remain anonymous because of the subject matter.

In my recent therapy session we were talking about helpful and none helpful relationships. Relationships in which we felt free to share our feelings and know they would be heard and responded to rather than relationships were we were not free to share or feelings and often our emotions would be quickly shut down by another.

I mentioned in the group, my closest relationships are with those we swing with.  Since then I have been thinking why this is. We feel we have the freedom to talk about anything and know we won’t be judged or it repeated outside the room. I suppose the close physical intimacy we share also translates to emotional intimacy in our case.

This has been a part of swinging we never expected. As a couple we have not had such close trusted friends before. Those who accept us and are there for no matter what. To be honest we started swinging to liven up our sex life and meet with others who are a bit more adventurous as well. I’ve also been surprised how it has helped us as a couple to communicate better and how I really enjoy just watching my partner have fun.

It’s still something I do not talk about openly. People can be so judgemental of something they know so little about. As a couple the swinging is helping us when my mental health is still quite unstable.  A part of me still struggles with the moral aspect of it all. We are together and will remain so and the couples we meet are long married and will stay so too so hopefully minimising risk of it getting messy. At the moment swinging helps our relationship and we regularly check in with each other that we are still enjoying it.