Why is it so hard to admit I need help?

This week I met with some lovely people from Mind Charity. Our social worker suggested to me a befriender may help me. I left the girls at home with big lad as it is the school holidays.

I spoke to the ladies about support they could offer me.  I arrived at the meeting really together,  and as I we spoke about the situations in which I need support day to day I began to get upset. 

I often will not acknowledge my difficulties, I simply try to ignore them and move on.

Acknowledging I am often not coping as well as I wish and I need help from others is difficult for me. I learned to do so much on my own, be self sufficient in order to survive. As a mum there is stuff that needs to be done. In the playing of that role with it’s obvious “job description” I can often function at times where on my own I could not.


At times I would have been in the place to be a befriender, now I am in a place I need one.

Looking in what I have achieved in the past, compared to what I can do now is painful.  I’ve been invited to a birthday party of a family I used to work with with lots of other families I know. I even know the lady leading the party. I’ve had to decline the invitation. I’m not the person I was back then.

In acknowledging I need help, I admit I am not invincible. The “I’m not going to let this shit beat me” is something I’ve used for the last thirty odd years. Admitting I cannot do it on my own leaves me feeling vulnerable and scared. Not a place I like to be in. The thing is, if I saw a friend in need of help I would be quick to help. So maybe this is a  scary new chapter of admitting I can’t make it on my own, of connecting and trusting others (eeeek)


So maybe I am ready to say…



M’ aider

Help me.


3 thoughts on “Why is it so hard to admit I need help?

  • February 14th, 2018 at 7:13 pm

    Oh honey me and you are reading off the same page at the moment. It really sucks when we can see all the things you use to be able to do, and feel you should still be able to do if it wern’t for our stupid brains. I know asking for help is bloody scary, especially if you are normally the one who gives the help, but you’ve taken the biggest step now. And you know your friends in your phone will always be there to help in anyway we can xxx

  • February 27th, 2018 at 12:01 pm

    Muddly Mum, thanks so much for the post.Much thanks again. Really Cool.


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